Leave it to the Catholics to make Ash Wednesday fall on Hump Day.
If you position your ladygarden correctly on a toilet, you should be able to pee fear-free.
There may be two sides to every story, but you’re still a douche in both of them.
HEAR US ROAR. Happy International Women's Day, all!
About 5 hours ago
As long as you keep loving me I can keep hiding my crazy.
Congratulations on moving into something other than a treatment facility.
Your pants say yoga, but your butt says McDonald’s.
They can’t trade him. I spent $100 on his motherfucking sticker.
There’s no age limit on a Happy Meal.
Time to discover which elf was up to no good while the others were making snowmen out of marshmallows.
I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.
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