What’s Wrong With the Doll From Rudolph?

Categories: Holidays | Tags: , , , ,
Published on 13 Dec, 2010

I’ll tell you what I want for Christmas.


This doll.

For years I’ve wondered what the hell is wrong with the doll from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I mean, the train has a square wheel and the cowboy shoots jelly from his gun (I fail to see how this is a disadvantage…) and all. But what’s wrong with the cute little dolly?

Well, in an effort to bring news to the masses here at the venerable journalistic institution Pajamas and Coffee (snort), I Googled it. I checked out the RankinBass.com site, which isn’t so much about Rankin and Bass as it is about the guy who wrote a cool book about them (the book is out of print but the guy sells it on ebay and amazon for $75).

Rankin and Bass and their coolio ‘animagic’ TV Christmas specials rocked my world when I was a kid. To this day they’re mandatory holiday viewing for my kids and I am ALL ABOUT Rudolph, Santa Claus is Comin to Town (love Mrs. Claus’ younger hippie days and the part where Winter Warlock melts) and my very fave, Year Without a Santa Claus.

The Miser brothers. ‘Nuff said.

snow miser

And the MUSIC?! Know it all by heart. Maury Laws and his musical genius will live on forever in our little misfit hearts. Put One Foot In Front of the Other, Anyone Can Be Santa, Why Am I Such a Misfit, and to me the best of the best- Snow Miser and Heat Miser’s ragtime classic songs. The very opening trumpeted sounds make me want to get up and start doing the background dancer spinny routine (He’s Mister Heat Miser, He’s Mister Sun….)

But back to Rudolph’s challenged friends. So I found an article about the doll. $75 book author guy reveals in an article that (in his $75 book) you can discover (for $75) on page five that Arthur Rankin stated to him that the doll’s issue is ‘more psychological than physical.’

Also, Wikipedia reports: “Her misfit problem is never explained on the special, but was revealed on NPR’s Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me! news quiz show (broadcast December 8, 2007). The show revealed that Rudolph’s producer, Arthur Rankin Jr., says Dolly’s problem was psychological, caused from being abandoned by her mistress and suffering depression from feeling unloved.”

Exquizzle me?

She’s a PSYCHO and THAT is what is wrong with her? Just because she CRIES EASILY? I mean, the abandonment issues are totally sad and all, and people actually PAY MONEY for dolls that cry so I fail to see how her slight depression challenge makes her a MISFIT! So…what? Rankin and Bass are saying all females are hysterical??! Now, Mrs. Claus in her various iterations and the very-cool Mother Nature are great stop-motion-animated women and all but making ’emotional’ a ‘misfit’ thing is wrong. So she’s emo. So what?

If I was a kid, I’d still want her for Christmas. Even as an adult I do.

So, JavaJammers, tell me your favorite Rankin and Bass TV moment!

  • Donald Trump's presidential campaign is like a continuing series of SNL skits. Is The Lonely Island behind it? Very entertaining <pops corn>