My Funny Valentine…

Category: Holidays
Published on: 13 Feb, 2010

“Hey! Look at me, everybody! I’m a big fat eight-year-old sexual predator…and I’m GAY!”

Apeshit for Alpha-Bits

Category: Random Tags:
Published on: 05 Feb, 2010

You might as well start burning libraries down, you High Fructose Corn Syrup Pimp! HOW ARE MY CHILDREN GOING TO LEARN TO READ!?!?!?!

Oh, Baby

Category: Parenting
Published on: 25 Jan, 2010

“In motherhood, the days are long, but the years are short.”

Gal Sprout Cupcakes

Category: Humor, Parenting
Published on: 22 Jan, 2010

what happens in real life, especially if it affects my family, has to be more important than what happens online.

Peace and Pubic Hair

Category: Humor
Published on: 21 Jan, 2010

Did you just fucking BLOW A PUBIC HAIR IN MY GENERAL DIRECTION??

Love/Hate GPS Relationship

Category: Humor Tags:
Published on: 18 Jan, 2010

If I throw Diet Coke on you, will you die?

Fuck a Duck

Category: Humor, Sex Tags: , ,
Published on: 13 Jan, 2010

I am giving a motherfucking rubber ducky a motherfucking blow job now.

Spank You Very Much

Category: Opinion, Parenting
Published on: 07 Jan, 2010

The secret to parenting is simply to be the kind of parent you never want your kid to be someday.

In Defense of the F Bomb

Category: Random Tags: ,
Published on: 05 Jan, 2010

Chances are I’m not reading your happy crappy Jesus-loving blog either, so we’re even.

Redneck Nation

Category: Random
Published on: 04 Jan, 2010

Instead of visions of sugar plums dancing in my head that night, I had visions of kids screaming, camouflage, loud country music, empty beer cans and random cars parked everywhere.

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